Blond Jokes 7: Exchange
by Stormshadow13
Summary: Seventh in the Blond Jokes Saga. Dark goes to Satoshi's apartment to steal back the artwork that Krad made off with during his last theft. There are more jokes, a lamp is destroyed and the thief leaves his hunter a gift.


Blond Jokes 7:Exchange

AN: This is NOT my personal opinion of Blonds.

(Daisuke to Dark)

((Dark to Daisuke))

/Satoshi to Krad/

/Krad to Satoshi/

X

Large black wings folded vanishing as their owner landed stealthily on the balcony of Satoshi Hiwatari's apartment. The phantom thief was here to retrieve the Hikari artwork that his adorable counterpart had liberated from his possession the night before. Just the thought of that sneaky blond devil made the kaito grin stupidly he did so admire the other half of his soul's ability to think on his feet. At least the blond could when he wasn't blinded by rage. Dark chuckled mentally it was just so easy however to aggravate his opposite and the hunter was just so cute when he was all pissed off.

The lock on the teenage police commander's door was disappointingly easy to pick and it only took the dark entity a moment to enter the apartment. Amethyst eyes flicked around the room taking note of the layout. It looked like the last Hikari was fast asleep only visible as a lump under the blankets. As much as he wanted to see his blond angel in physical form the kaito doubted that Krad would be pleased to see him after the blond jokes he'd made today at the end of their tamer's school day.

On silent cat feet the thief tip toed past the bed breathing a sigh of relief as he made it to the hall with no sign of the bed's occupant waking. Once in the hall Dark reached out with his magic seeking the magical signature of the statue he was after. Purple eyebrows drew together into a frown as while he could feel the presence of several Hikari artworks around the apartment none were the one that he was after. The black angel moved carefully through the rooms searching for his target. The kaito finally ended up in the bedroom door once more frowning in confusion. Maybe his counterpart had hidden the statue somewhere else.

He breathed a soft sigh it looked like he would have to wake the creep up and get information from him or get his lovely hunter to appear and spill the beans. The phantom moved quietly over to the edge of the bed reaching for the corner of the blankets. Purple eyes widened in alarm as it turned out not to be the creep under the covers but several pillows shoved together to make it look like there was a person under the cloth. Dark went completely still as slender fingers snaked around his forearm and a very sharp white feather was pressed against his throat.

"How lovely of you to visit thief."

The phantom shrugged carefully, "you know me, can't pass up an opportunity to see my angel." The kaito shivered lips curling into a happy smile as he felt his counterpart press closer against his back.

Daisuke rolled his eyes, ("yeah, he's so going to buy that one.")

(("Shush."))

Amber feline eyes narrowed, "do you really expect me to fall for that?" The hunter tightened his fingers on the darker entity's arm. "Do you really take me for a fool?"

"Actually I was hoping you would go all gooey and let me ravish the light out of you." The kaito smiled widely eyes focused on the bed, "look, we even have a bed for comfort."

The hunter twitched, "now you are just being delusional."

"A thief can dream can't he?" A soft snort was his response, "so how about you remove your lovely feather from my throat and tell me where the statue is?" Tan lips lifted into a cocky smirk, "and I'll give you a special treat."

/"What does he think I am… a dog?"/

/"You're actually more like a cat."/

/"Excuse me?"/

/"Well,"/ Satoshi smirked, /"you're stubborn, obstinate, easily offended, like shiny things, enjoy sleeping..."/

/"Satoshi-sama, are you trying to say that I am intractable, lazy and easily distracted?"/

The teen hummed in amusement, /"oh look, Dark got away."/

/"Damn it!"/ Krad snapped his attention away from his tamer only to find that the blue haired brat was right.

The phantom's grinned widely as he felt his angel's grip loosen slightly apparently distracted by something the creep was saying. The purple haired kaito twisted his arm breaking the hunter's grip while with the other hand he reached up wrapping his own fingers about a slender wrist pulling the hand and sharp feather away from his throat. A quick twist of the white clad wrist had the now harmless feather drifting to the floor. The thief shoved his other half knocking him off balance and before the blond could recover the kaito had released his grip and rolled quickly over the bed to land on the other side now facing his counterpart.

The ice demon drew in a calming breath as he locked eyes with his smirking opposite. "Thief," golden eyes narrowed, "it was bold of you to come here tonight." The hunter cocked his head, "did you really think that I would not be expecting you?"

Dark chuckled softly amethyst eyes drinking in the white angel across from him. "I figured that you might have anticipated me coming." He waved a hand at the tangled blankets and pillows, "I wasn't however expecting a nifty little deception like this." The kaito cocked his head, "I also didn't think that you would keep the statue on your person to hide it's magical signature."

Krad smirked smugly reaching into his coat to withdraw the statue he'd stolen from the other angel holding it up, "ah, yes, this little trinket of yours." Pale lips curved into a cold smile, "I maybe tempted to trade it for something of mine that you have."

The thief shrugged, "sorry, I don't have it with me."

"That is to bad for you," the white angel tucked the statue back into his clothing. "You shall have to take it from me by force then," the ice demon spread his hands golden magic beginning to crackle around his fingers.

"I would rather do other things to you in a bedroom then fight…" Dark spread his own hands smirk firmly in place, "but if you insist." The thief tilted his head, "then I shall give you what you want," He ducked the first energy blast easily hopping up onto the bed and then over his hunter's head.

/"Hey! Not in my room!"/ Sapphire eyes widened, /"on that point, not in the apartment!"/ The teenage commander scowled as he was ignored, /"Damn it Krad!"/

("Dark! Are you crazy! Don't fight in Hiwatari-kun's apartment!") The red head spluttered as he was ignored completely by his magical companion.

The kaito landed lightly darting out the bedroom door down the small hall and into the living room. He turned quickly dropping into a half crouch, "so my other half, why do blonds wash their hair in the sink?"

/(/"Seriously?"/)/

Dark chuckled lowly at the incredulous squawk from his host as well from the sound of indignant disbelief from the hall. "Because that is where you are supposed to wash vegetables." He grinned amused at the mental picture his brain created of the outraged expression adorning his opposite's face. "So did you hear about the blond who bought an AM radio?" The phantom's grin widened at the annoyed footsteps coming down the hall, "It took him a month to realize that he could listen to it at night."

Satoshi couldn't help the snicker that escaped his lips even as he worried for the state of his apartment. He was not looking forwards to the mess that was going to result from the magical fight even if he did get to hear more blond jokes. The teen hoped that the kaito had a plan in mind because otherwise he was going to help clean after the battle,

The ice hunter growled softly stalking towards the living room. He had to tuck his wings in tight to his body to avoid getting them caught against the hall walls. The apartment was much to small for him to maneuver comfortably with his wings out but the blond never considered vanishing them.

"Why can't blonds make ice cubes?" Dark smirked as his not amused counterpart appeared in the entrance, "because they can't remember the recipe." He Ducked rolling out of the way of Krad's pounce rising once more into a half crouch now in the hall doorway. "How do you sink a submarine full of blondes?" Amethyst eyes sparkled, "you knock on the door." The phantom then raised his hands beckoning the hunter, "come here pretty."

Krad snarled turning from where he'd landed lightly on the back of the couch unconsciously fanning his wings and knocking over a lamp on one of the side tables. "I am going to ring your neck!"

Satoshi winced as the lamp hit the floor shattering, /"Krad! Your wings!"/

The ice demon ignored his tamer's protest once more leaping for the purple haired entity,

The phantom dropped flat to his back allowing his opposite to sail over his head. Before the hunter could turn to face his counterpart Dark had risen to his feet shoving the ice demon into the hall. Where his wings made it impossible for the white angel to turn around. "So why do blonds hold their hands tightly over their ears?"

The Hikari curse snarled kicking back behind himself and smiling in grim satifaction at the grunt of pain from the other angel.

The thief winced as the hunter's kick connected with his leg. The phantom ignored the pain, "to keep their thoughts in." He quickly pulled out a plastic bag removing the cloth within. Stepping up close behind his angel Dark reached around pressing the cloth over his counterpart's mouth and nose.

Krad choked as the other angel pressed a cloth over his face gagging at the sickly sweet smell. His legs suddenly gave out from beneath him as the walls tilted and his thoughts faded. He was aware of the kaito wrapping his arms around his body keeping him from falling to the floor but his mind was suddenly sluggish and he was unable to resist as the darker being moved him back into the bedroom allowing him to crumple onto the bed.

("Dark?")

(("Their fine Dai-chan")) The phantom carefully rolled his counterpart onto his back noticing that amber eyes were slightly open showing that Krad wasn't completely unconscious. "I am truly sorry about this my angel but we can't fight here in Creepy-boys place without causing a lot of damage." He reached out gently stroking several strands of flaxen hair from his other half's face, The kaito then retreaved the statue from the hunter's jacket tucking the artwork into his own coat. He then reached into another of his pockets pulling something out that he quickly tied to the bottom of the ice demon's ponytail. "I really am sorry," he leaned over lightly pressing his lips to a pale cheek before straightening and quietly slipping out the balcony doors.

X

A little while later Krad groaned sitting up blinking slowly rubbing at his head, /"damn that thief."/

/"Well at least the apartment is still intact,"/ sighed Satoshi. The police commander's sapphire eyes then narrowed, /"other then that lamp in the living room that is."/

The hunter snorted climbing to his feet, /"Satoshi-sama, you hated that lamp."/ Amber eyes rolled in exasperation, /"honestly I did you a favor. Now if your Stepfather notices it's gone you can rightfully blame me,"/

The teen nodded, /"true."/

Krad blinked feline eyes going wide at the feeling of something heavy weighing down the bottom of his ponytail, The white angel carefully reached back tugging his hair over his shoulder. The blond's mouth dropped open as he regarded the intricate silver and crystal cross tied to the long strands of gold,

The last Hikari's eyes also went wide in shock, /"looks like Dark left you a gift."/

The ice demon stared at the cross for several long moments before he growled removing the beautiful piece of jewelry from his hair and stuffing it grumpily into a pocket. Cat like eyes closed as the white angel gave control back to his tamer retreating to the back of the teenager's mind to sulk.

Satoshi's lips twitched as he pushed his glasses up his nose, /"does it really bother you that much that Dark knows your taste and is able to gift you with something that you actually like?"/ The blue haired teen chuckled softly at the frosty silence from his companion. /"You know that if you don't ware it you're going to hurt the thief's feelings."/ He chuckled again at the now grumpy silence from the magical entity. The commander turned his attention away from his curse ready to clean up any evidence of the short battle that had taken place this night.


End file.
